Man Assaults Toad

After being escorted out of a bar, a man in northern Indiana picked up a toad and started licking it and dancing with it in the parking lot.

The police arrived and told him he couldn't be on the bar's property. The man apparently left, but came back ... licking and dancing with a different toad. (I'm not sure who determined it was a different toad, but that's what the story says!) He was then arrested for misdemeanor trespassing.

While reading this story, I noted a number of errors on his part:

1. You're not supposed to lick them, you're supposed to kiss them.
2. You're supposed to kiss frogs ... I'm not sure if it works with toads.
3. And, if I understand it correctly, it doesn't work for the random drunken idiot in a bar parking lot ... I believe it only works for princesses.

The real victims here, of course, are those toads. They have to be traumatized. There's probably not enough water in all of the Great Lakes to wash away the memory of an assault like that. The poor things may never recover.

You can read the full story here.