Don't forget to visit my website! Jackie Coleman - Author

Sunday, August 31, 2014

A Few Wedding Pics

My boyfriend and his last little girl.
It's hard to smile when your heart is breaking.
Mother nature didn't cooperate and allow us to have the wedding in my boyfriend's garden, so the ceremony and reception were moved to another venue, but it turned out wonderfully.

I've got some great video (which I will post later) of the father/daughter dance ... and then I nearly filled up my phone with video's of my boyfriend dancing with his other daughter, his stepmother, both of my daughter's, and his youngest daughter again. I don't think anyone videotaped when my boyfriend and I danced ... which is too bad ... because we were pretty amazing!

Everyone had a a lot of fun, and despite the last minute change of venue, they got hitched without a hitch! The bride and groom wanted a small, intimate gathering with the people who mean the most to them, and that's exactly what they got. It was lovely.

The bride was radiant ... and now she and her Prince Charming are now beginning their happily ever after :)

The groom, the bride, the grandmother, the father, and the sister. 
Me and my handsome boyfriend.
Is it any wonder my heart skips a beat whenever I see him?!!!!!

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Today is International Bacon Day (and Wedding Day!)

My boyfriend's daughter is getting married today ... on International Bacon Day! What a great day to get married, right?! Sadly, there is nothing even remotely related to bacon on the menu. Nevertheless, I shall do my best to celebrate this special day despite the cruelty of being denied this delicacy at the reception!

The Saturday before Labor Day is set aside as International Bacon Day. (Like we need a special day to appreciate the deliciousness of bacon!) Quite frankly, I'd be on board with celebrating International Bacon Day the first Saturday of every month! Or, how about just making it every Saturday?

Bacon, in my humble opinion, is the most delicious meat on the planet. Pretty much everything is better with bacon! I know anti-bacon people who say you take nine minutes off of your life with every piece you eat, but those are the last minutes, when you're old and sick, so I'm not really interested in prolonging those minutes! Those are the minutes I'm dreading ... and makes eating bacon that much more attractive!

I haven't have any bacon in a while and will likely survive yet another baconless day. But the wedding isn't until this evening and I don't have to be there until late afternoon ... so I could have a BLT for lunch! This midday meal, by anti-bacon calculations, will take roughly 36 minutes off of the end of my life ... and it will be worth it!

Friday, August 29, 2014

Spray Tan Drama

The white spot on my calf,
now camouflaged to my
I got a spray tan at No Fry Zone after work yesterday. They warn you not to get wet for eight hours afterwards. The first time Thing 2 got a spray tan, she got one drop of water on her arm on her way to the car, and the tan disappeared entirely from that one spot ... so I took the "no water" warning to heart.

As I drove home, I could see lightening off in the distance towards my house. I had been on the north and the east sides of town all day with nary a drop, but I drove into a torrential downpour. Of course, I didn't have an umbrella with me, but even if I had, I wouldn't have risked walking (or running) from my van to the house in the rain. So, I sat in the driveway and played games on my iPad while waiting for the rain to stop. It was either that or risk being polka-dotted or mottled, which would look like my skin was melting!

My boyfriend knew I was getting a spray tan and had to be careful, so I texted him that I was sitting in my driveway waiting for the rain to stop. After having a good laugh, he suggested I come over. I could pull into his garage and get out without getting wet. We could visit while I waited for the rain to stop. Win-win! I drove over, pulled into the garage ... and hit my leg on my wet van getting out of the vehicle. Ugg! I ended up with a big white spot on my calf, and a white line running down to my ankle.

When the rain finally stopped (three hours later), I drove home and applied some self-tanning lotion to the spot. The drip line is completely gone, and I think I've camouflaged the white spot well enough that no one will notice. You would have to be pretty darn close to my leg to notice, so if anyone does get close enough, I'll promptly shoo them away ... then go stand by my boyfriend for protection!

Even if I do have a "less than perfect tan" spot on my leg, I'm glad I was offered refuge at my boyfriends house during the rain. I only had a quarter-tank of gas, and I don't think it would have lasted from 5:00 (when I got home), until 8:00 (when it finally quit raining). Not only that, I've always heard that it's hard on the engine to let a vehicle idle for long periods of time ... and I'm sure three hours would be considered a long period of time. AND, not wishing to known as the idiot who ran out of gas in her own driveway, I would have to get gas to keep the air conditioner running ... because sweat is water, so sweating for 8 hours after a tan is a no-no! As the gas tank emptied, I would have been trying to figure out which gas station would allow me the most coverage while pumping to keep from getting hit by rain.

But let's face it ... I would most likely have hit my leg getting out of the van at the gas station, too ... and the mist from the rain would probably have given me speckled appearance that would make it appear as though I had some kind of contagious skin disease. My boyfriend's daughter is getting married tomorrow, and "contagious" is not the look I'm going for! Since I'm not "legally" family, I won't be in all of the pictures, but I will undoubtedly be in some. I'm not very photogenic as it is, so a speckled/freckled suntan that looks like smallpox would have left people scrambling to get away from me!

Thursday, August 28, 2014

I Have Been Deceived

Not even close!

Strangely, these (exterior) lights only needed touching up, and since they looked exactly like the top of this can, I figured I'd be able to check this chore off my "to-do" list quickly. It didn't work out that way.

I knew immediately that it wasn't the look I was going for, but I figured I'd "give it a minute". I painted both lamps ... and hated the results. I ended up going back to the store (who exchanged it without question) and went with Oil Rubbed Bronze. Initially, I almost bought Oil Rubbed Bronze, but decided I'd stick with what they already looked like. I should have went with my first instinct.

So, the little chore that should have been finished with ease ended up taking several hours. But, it's done, and they look amazing ... and I forgot to take a picture of the finished product! I'll post a pic of them later.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Which Came First ... the Chicken or the Egg?

Is Olivia's laziness rubbing off on Thing 2,
or is Thing 2's laziness rubbing off on Olivia?
The third option, of course, is that they're both just lazy by nature!
In all fairness to Thing 2, she's working and going to school full-time. I realize those two activities do not preclude her from sitting up, but I'll cut her some slack ... if she'll QUIT EATING IN THE FAMILY ROOM!!!

Monday, August 25, 2014

We Were a Little Apprehensive When We Saw This!

This past weekend my boyfriend and I worked in his yard all morning, then we went to my house so that he could cut my grass. When we went out back, we saw this ... a storage bin with two large landscaping stones on top of it. We weren't sure what to make of it ... and wondered what was under it! Both of us were envisioning a raccoon, but neither of us could conceive a scenario where my daughter would get close enough to a raccoon to put a big bucket on it, then stack stones on top!!

I stayed up on the deck while he tapped on the bin with a shovel to see if whatever was under it was still alive. Nothing moved, so he took the stones off the top and tipped the bucket over with the shovel. It was empty! We were, to say the least, perplexed!

I texted my daughter to ask if she knew anything about it.  She did. She used the bin to take the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. I asked what the stones were for, and she said she used them to set her camera on. Mystery solved! And best of all, there was no dead ... or very angry ... animal to deal with!

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Speaking of Stoplights ...

Have you ever thought about how few criminals are arrested specifically because of traffic violations? I know some are, and that's what makes it so dangerous every time a police officer makes a traffic stop ... but a lot of people get tickets everyday, and very few of those are arrested or taken in for questioning regarding some other crime they are suspected of being complicit in. Most of the ones who end up in handcuffs are arrested for drug or alcohol related offenses specifically related to that particular traffic stop, or for drugs or drug paraphernalia discovered after they were pulled over.

Ted Bundy, a notorious serial killer, was always apprehended because of a traffic stop, but he's the exception, not the rule.

I find it interesting that people who have no problem murdering and/or raping innocent women and children will draw the line at running a red light or rolling through a stop sign. They have no regard for human life or the families their actions destroy. They ignore the rules of civility ... both man-made laws and God's commandments  ... and yet they have no problem taking orders from and obeying a light bulb.

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Things I Don't Understand - Episode 6: Left Turn Lights

I have never understood why it is legal for me to make a left turn off of a side street, onto a busy street ... crossing traffic coming from both directions ... with no light telling me it's okay to go ... yet I cannot be trusted to turn left at an intersection with a traffic ... against one direction of traffic ... unless the left turn light is green.

Most traffic signals in my hometown allow left turns only when the left turn light is green. I live in a city nicknamed "Stoplight City" by truckers, so when I say "most traffic signals", I'm talking about a lot of traffic signals. I can't tell you how many times I sit at a red light while the traffic lanes for cars going straight remains green ... except there are no moving vehicles in sight.  The only vehicles at the intersection are the ones in the left turn lane (with a red light), and the vehicles on the cross street. We all sit there waiting for the light to change.

I could easily, and just as importantly ... safely ... turn left, but if I did, I'd be breaking the law. Now keep in mind that before I sat at this light for five minutes, I had to turn left onto this very road not too far back ... with no outside help from anyone, man or machine. Where is the wisdom in that?

Some of the most dangerous intersections in the city allow you to turn left on a green arrow or a green light. If it's safe at the most dangerous of intersections, why is it so dangerous in safer ones?

The people who regulate traffic signals and roadways in this city probably have engineering degrees, and are a good reminder that even people who graduate in the bottom of their class can get a job with the government.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Change in User Timelines on Twitter

Twitter is now showing tweets on your timeline that it thinks you might enjoy, despite the fact that you have not elected to follow that particular tweeter ... or in some cases ... have specifically chosen NOT to follow them. They say they base these tweets by a variety of factors, including popularity, trends, and how the people you follow are interacting with particular tweets. You can read about the Twitter change here.

If I start seeing selfie tweets from vain, barely dressed, self-obsessed reality "stars" (and I use that term loosely), I will likely close my twitter account altogether. I don't follow those people for a reason. I simply don't care about their thoughts or activities ... or what they look like in their underwear.

I'm a grown woman. I raised three kids all by myself while I working full-time and attending college full-time, and I graduated with high honors. I think I'm more than capable of choosing which Twitter accounts I wish to follow.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

The Birds and the Bees

After a recent rain, I noticed thousands of birds feeding in this field (you can only see a fraction of them in this photo). A few weeks prior, I saw thousands of bees swarming over an open field downtown ... (poor quality) video here.

I'm sure the birds were out shopping for worms the rain brought to the surface, but I have no idea why that field was swarming with bees. I don't know how well you can see the bees in that video, but they were everywhere ... and yet they never left the grassy area. It was almost as if there was an invisible barrier preventing them from flying onto the sidewalk. It was eerie!

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Looking for the Body

I started buying frozen blueberries for my morning yogurt. I love fresh blueberries, but sometimes they are so tart it's painful to eat them ... and frozen blueberries are always sweet and juicy. I generally make my yogurt for the next morning as soon as I get home from work, but sometimes I get lazy, or sidetracked, and don't make it until the morning.

The first time I used frozen blueberries, my yogurt was very watery from the thawing blueberries, so I started putting them in a baggie and adding them just before I'm ready to eat. This works well if I make it the night before, as the blueberries are thawed and ready to eat in the morning, but if I make it in the morning, the blueberries are (obviously) frozen solid. So now when I make my breakfast in the morning, I add some water to the baggie to thaw the berries faster. The first time I did this, I sealed the baggie and left the blueberries in the water until I got to work. I didn't realize it, but the baggie wasn't sealed tightly, and I had left a trail of blueberry juice down the hall. (Hansel and Gretel should have done this instead of dropping bread crumbs ... the birds couldn't have eaten this!).

But, I digress!

Anyway, a colleague and I were working away when the door opened. Two concerned co-workers timidly poked their head into the room and asked if we were okay, wondering if someone had cut themselves. We were fine, we told them, although we were confused as to why they might think otherwise. Visibly relieved, they said they had followed a path of blood to our door!

Turns out that while blueberry juice may be purple, it looks a lot like blood when dripped down a hallway ... and they were dreading finding the body at the end of the bloody trail!

Monday, August 18, 2014

This is an Actual 911 Dispatch

There is someone in my hometown who tweets fire and police dispatches all day. I suspect this is a paid position by the city/county, and not someone with no life who does it for a hobby, but I really don't know.

Whatever the case, the information this person tweets comes in very handy. If you encounter a massive traffic jam, this person's twitter feed will likely tell you why ... or if you happen to catch the tweet before you get there (I never do), you can avoid the congestion altogether.

I don't have time to read twitter all day and I don't have it set up to send me alerts on any of my mobile devices, but I do check this particular account if I wonder what's going on or if someone asks me to find out why traffic is at a standstill or what all the sirens are about.

The last week of July, I saw this tweet ... "700 block of (I deleted the address tweeted). Caller believes someone has been in his apartment because his T.V has been set to Spanish. Officer en route".

That's all the information I have on this particular "crime" ... but my guess is that there was no sign of forced entry and that the police are treating this as an inside job!

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Roses and Cupcakes from my Daughters

I recently had a birthday, and I'm not ashamed to tell you I'm 35! I'm not saying I'm 35 because women over 35 always say that ... I'm saying it because I had Thing 2 when I was 31, and she promised to stay four forever.

So, you do the math ... I was 31 when I had her, she's four ... 31 + 4 = 35. Math doesn't lie, folks.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Mumford, the Talking Wolverine

Thing 2 and I were taking a walk the other day, and guess who we ran into? Mumford ... the Talking Wolverine!

Yes, I realize this is a picture of a groundhog and not a wolverine, but a couple of years ago I had a dream about Mumford, the Talking Wolverine, and this is what he looked like! In my dream, "Mumford the Talking Wolverine" was a tv show ... but what people didn't know was that Mumford really could talk, and my boyfriend used Mumford to deliver messages to a network of spies. I thought this was quite clever! I mean, really ... if you wanted to get word of a critical, top-secret mission to a network of spies, who better than an innocent woodland creature to deliver it without arousing suspicion ... because no one believes animals can really talk ... right?!!! Very clever, indeed.

Friday, August 15, 2014


I took this is picture while out walking the other day. They are my oldest daughter's favorite flower. As a child she always wanted me to plant them. I did one year, but I wasn't pleased with them. When they are blooming, they are gorgeous, but after the flowers are spent, you have to wait for new blooms to set, so there are dormant periods when you just have the foliage. Even though I don't plant them anymore, I love that other people do ... and it always makes me smile when I see them blooming.

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Childhood Books and Memories

On April 23rd of this year I posted a blog about a book I loved as a child, but couldn't remember the name (I Can't Remember the Name of a Book I LOVED as a Child).

"The Middle Sister", by Mirian E. Mason is probably the book I spoke of in the article, but I don't think it's the one that got me in trouble during that math class!

After discovering the name of the book, I bought a used copy online. I do remember the story, and I think I related with the protagonist because she was afraid of everything. As a child, I, too, was quite timid and afraid of my own shadow, so I guess that was the attraction for me. That, and the fact the I am the quintessential middle child!

The book did not live up to the built-up hype in my mind, but it's a nice story and a quick read. I can't imagine it took me long to read, even as a child. I wish I could remember the names of more of the books I read and re-read as a child. The only other one that comes to mind is "The Witch of Blackbird Pond". It was first published in 1958, so it was in print many, many years before I bought it! I don't remember anything about it other than the fact that the main character was named Prudence and I bought it from one of the Scholastic Book sales the school had. I think I'll see if I can find a copy of that book, too!

Wednesday, August 13, 2014


Supermoon Eve.
In June last year, I got to see the Supermoon rising over the Blue Ridge Mountains (photo below). I wasn't able to be there for this Supermoon, but I did try (and failed) to catch a good image from where I live. The clouds prevented a good photograph, so it's not spectacular by anyone's standards. However, if you squint while looking at the above picture, you can pretend the trees are the mountain tops!

Supermoon over the Blue Ridge Mountains, June 2013.

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

I Can't Believe Robin Williams is Gone

Robin Williams aboard the USS Enterprise in 2003.
My boyfriend caught part of a movie on television this past weekend. It was August Rush, starring Robin Williams. He told me he wanted us to watch it sometime so he could see the whole movie. I, too, have seen bits and pieces of this movie, but never the entire movie, and have wanted to see it. I never remembered it when we're perusing for a movie to watch.

And then I come home yesterday to the news that Robin Williams has died by his own hand. It's so tragic ... and so incredibly selfish. I realize people who kill themselves are in extreme emotional pain, but suicide punishes their loved ones unlike any other kind of death. It's a very cruel thing to do to their family, who then spend the rest of their lives wondering "What if ....?". My brother committed suicide, so I speak from experience.

I was saddened to hear that he was gone, and then angry at how it had happened. Suicide is the coward's way out. It transfers the sufferer's pain onto the people who loved them the most, and that's not fair, especially if you have children ... and he did.

I understand Robin Williams fought depression for most of his life, and yesterday was probably the scenario his family feared the most. My heart goes out to his family and friends. I hope they find a way to deal with their grief and don't let this tragedy derail the trajectory of their own lives, as is so often the case. I worry about his kids... children whose parents commit suicide are much more likely to succumb to the same fate ... and it sounds like this family has already suffered enough.

Aside from the memorable film roles and laughs he gave us, Robin Williams supported our troops by performing for our soldiers in the field. I have a great deal of respect for those who go into war zones to boost the moral of our men and women in uniform. How ironic that he spent his life making people happy, yet happiness eluded him.

I hurt for his family. While the public knew him as a comedienne without equal, and for the dramatic roles he played with an expertise no one expected from a "funny man", his family knew him as a husband and father, brother and friend. The public lost a beloved entertainer, but his family lost their anchor.

May he rest in peace.

Monday, August 11, 2014

Sunday, August 10, 2014

Surprise Flowers on an Already Pretty Plant

I have this plant in two windows boxes. One box gets a lot of sun, the other is mostly in the shade, and they're both growing like weeds. So much so that I've had to prune them back a few times this summer. They are both giving me these tiny purple flowers! I bought the plant because the foilage is so pretty ... I had no idea they would flower. What a nice surprise it was to find these tiny blooms!

I can't remember what kind of plant they are, but I really like them! As tall as they get, they really aren't suited for window boxes, so I probably won't plant them there next year, but aren't they pretty?!!

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Bathroom Wisdom

This is on the wall in my upstairs bathroom.
And this one is in the downstairs bathroom.
I didn't intentionally set out to put words of wisdom in my "public" bathrooms, but that's what I did. I didn't realize this until the other day. But I did raise three kids ... and all of whom spent a good deal of their time in the bathroom ... so even it it wasn't a conscious decision, my psyche apparently knew what it was doing!

Friday, August 8, 2014

No Idea ... Not Even a Clue!

Once again I was going through old pictures to get some to include in a slideshow for Thing 1 when she gets married this fall, and I burst out laughing when I came across this one! I have no idea what "look" Thing 3 was going for in this picture. I can't decide if he looks terrified or just goofy! He has always been very animated when a camera is pointed in his direction, so I'm not sure if this was intentional or if the photographer (another parent or cheerleader) just happened to take the picture at precisely the right (or wrong!) moment. Thing 2 appears to suspect something, but Thing 1 and I appear totally oblivious!

This picture was taken in Indianapolis, Indiana at a cheer competition ten years ago. Wow. Was it really ten years ago? It doesn't feel like it's been that long. The kids were in 3rd, 5th, and 7th grades, and now they're all in their twenties. Where did all the time go?

So, Thing 3 ... thanks for all the laughs at the silly faces you've made for the camera throughout the years. I think this might be my favorite!

Thursday, August 7, 2014

THIS is a Holiday I Can Get Onboard With!

Cape Hatteras Lighthouse,
drawn and given to me by my son.
Today is National Lighthouse Day!

On August 7, 1789, Congress approved an Act for the establishment and support of lighthouse, beacons, buoys and public piers. In Celebration of the 200th Anniversary of the signing of the Act and the commissioning of the first Federal lighthouse, Congress passed a resolution which designated August 7, 1989 as National Lighthouse Day.

I love lighthouses, so much so that I wrote a blog about lighthouses back in March. (Click here to read it ... or to refresh your memory Lighthouses).

If you're lucky enough to live near one of these landmarks, there are lots of activities planned at each location. For those not so lucky, we will have to be content to remember standing in the shadow of these iconic beacons, feeling the soft sand under our feet, the sound of the waves breaking and rolling onto the shore, and the wind from the ocean keeping us cool while the sun kisses our skin.

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Another Holiday I Won't Be Celebrating ...

Today is National Root Beer Float Day. A&W will  be giving away free (very small) root beer floats, and collecting donations to the Wounded Warrior Project. While the Wounded Warrior Project is something I would definitely support, I have no desire to get close enough to even smell root beer.

Several years ago I wrote a humorous blog about root beer ... you can read about it here Root Beer Blog Post.

I took the kids and some of their friends to Sonic one time when they were giving away free root beer floats. I tried to drink it, but just the smell of it made me want to throw up. My daughter's and I gave our root beer floats to my son, who swallowed them in one gulp as we looked on in horror.

I think I'd rather eat raspberries than drink root beer!

Tuesday, August 5, 2014

Help! My palm tree is sick!

Just looking at it, the plant looks green and healthy, and new fronds are sprouting and opening up all the time. My oldest daughter bought this for me for Father's Day in 2013, so it means a lot to me.

This evening I noticed a couple of branches in the back that were brown and dying. Upon further inspection, I noticed spots on them (photo's below). Is it some kind of mite? Are my other houseplants in danger?

I searched around a little bit, but didn't find much help online. Does anyone know what I need to do to save this palm? It would break my heart to lose it!

Monday, August 4, 2014

Mama was right ... it really IS better to give than to receive.

My pretty girls with flowers in their hair ... still wet with morning dew.
I love these flowers and love giving them to other "plant people".  In the past, I've given them to some "non-planties" only to learn they died a slow, agonizing death. After that, I've been more discriminating in whom I let adopt my lovely girls. 

I recently gave some to two women I work with, both of whom appreciate and love flowers as much as I do. I wanted to wait until "the girls" were blooming before I brought them in, but the late arrival of spring delayed their annual explosion of color, so I delivered them when they were green and luscious, but unadorned. Like a new mother leaving her infant for the first time, I came bearing instructions for care. They were thrilled to add these girls to their family and the look of happiness on their faces was my hefty reward! I got a text last night from one of them ... her new girl is blooming! It thrills my heart that she loves these flowers and will enjoy them for years to come. I'm not sure who is happier ... me or my flower-loving co-workers! Giving for no reason other than to see the smile on someone else's face is the best feeling there is.

I knew my pretty girl had found a good home when my friend took the time to photograph it and send it to me ... and that makes my heart smile :)

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Cue the Trumpets!

It finally happened! Savannah rolled over to 100,000. (Note: It's not as exciting on a digital odometer.) Luckily, this monumental event occurred on a Saturday, when a lot of parking lots are empty. When the odometer hit 99,998 I pulled off the road into a parking lot and drove in circles until it 99,999. Then I got out my phone and basically coasted that last mile while videotaping the odometer with my phone. FYI ... it takes a really long time to coast a mile! But I did it ... I captured the moment Savannah went from 99,999 to 100,000 (video below). Don't worry ... you don't have to watch the entire last mile ... I trimmed the video to 18 seconds. The "event" happens at the 11 second mark. I thought it was pretty cool!!

Saturday, August 2, 2014

I Probably Shouldn't Tell You This

Because I'm going to look like a total "girl" when you hear the story, but ... 

I spent Tuesday evening running errands with no problem, but when I got out to my van Wednesday morning, it wouldn't turn over ... it just clicked. I woke my daughter up and made her take me to work. She was probably asleep the whole time, but (somehow) I arrived safely.

My boyfriend came over that evening and looked at the van. It has a new alternator on it, so that wasn't likely the problem. He said the battery looked fairly new. "When did you buy it?" he asked. I had no idea. I remember important stuff ... like when I bought those lovely sandals with delicate straps in various shades of blue ... but not when I bought a battery for the van! I remember buying it, but not when. I remember it was bitter cold outside the day he followed me to the auto parts store to buy it (because they'll install it for you and he didn't want to stand outside in Siberian conditions to put in it). We got to the auto parts store ... only to have a woman wait on us. Being the gentleman that he is, he ended up helping install it because he couldn't stand a woman outside ... at night ... alone ... in that kind of cold.

Okay, back to Wednesday evening. After listening to my van, my boyfriend said it was most likely the battery or the starter. He cleaned the connections and had me try starting it again. It didn't start right away, but it finally turned over. He followed me to the service center, where the owner was just locking up. The mechanic said it sounded like the starter.

My daughter was off work Thursday, so she loaned me her SUV to drive to work (thus saving her another day of driving me to work in her sleep!) I got out to the vehicle ... and couldn't get the key to turn in the ignition. I tried several times before resorting to calling her and asking her if there was some kind of trick to starting her car. Of course, I had to call her a few times before she woke up and stumbled outside. She sat down in the passenger seat and I handed her the keys ... holding onto the fat gray one that starts the car. She looked at me and rolled her eyes. "Mom, that's your key!" She held up the black key. "This one is mine!"

Oops! My bad!

In my defense, we drive different models, but our vehicles are the same make and year ... and I didn't know she had a key to Savannah. I my mind, my mistake was forgivable ... but she didn't look very forgiving when she exited the vehicle and stumbled back inside. Fortunately she was asleep the whole time, so she probably won't remember the incident at all!

Friday, August 1, 2014

Today is National Girlfriend Day (gag!) and National Raspberry Cream Pie Day (yuk!)

I was informed that International Beer Day shares this day with National Girlfriend Day AND National Raspberry Cream Pie Day.

Something tells me a weepy, needy, neglected girl/woman "invented" this day to force her boyfriend to be nice to her ... at least one day a year. (I think this might be the most pathetic "holiday" ever invented.) My boyfriend always makes me feel like the luckiest woman alive ... so to me, every day already is National Girlfriend Day!

Honestly, girls/ladies ... if you need a special day to force your sweetie to make you to feel special, then it's time to start looking for another guy.

I also won't be celebrating National Raspberry Cream Pie Day. I hate raspberries! (Just typing the word raspberry makes me shudder with revulsion!)

Today is International Beer Day

August 1st (the first Friday in August) is International Beer Day. The borderline (or full-on) alcoholics who founded this "holiday" have declared three purposes:

  1. To gather with friends and enjoy the taste of beer.
  2. To celebrate those responsible for brewing and serving beer.
  3. To unite the world under the banner of beer by celebrating the beers of all nations together on a single day.

That's all fine and dandy, but personally, the beer drinkers I know don't need their own holiday ... they seem perfectly able to celebrate beer every day! Regardless of my thoughts, International Beer Day is now a (little-known) reality.

The "Earth Cooler"
As luck would have it, a company in Denmark has developed an "earth cooler" designed to keep your beer chilled to perfection ... no electricity or ice required. And, good news for all those drunk beer drinkers, it's touted as "easy to install"! Simply drill a 22" x 4' hole in the ground and drop in the economical $350 "earth cooler" into the resulting abyss. It has a crank handle to retrieve the cans, so you can enjoy a cold one even during a power outage. Brilliant!

But, I digress. Back to International Beer Day ...

"Participants" (I guess drunks or alcoholics sounded too judgmental) are encouraged to give one another the gift of beer by buying each other drinks and expressing their gratitude to brewers, bartenders, and other beer technicians. In the international spirit of the holiday, it is also suggested that "participants" step out of their domestic and/or locally brewed comfort zone and sample beer from another culture.

Given the "rules" of International Beer Day, I'm guessing brewers, bartenders, and other beer technicians invented this holiday, I'll be the gratitude "participants" are encouraged to give should be in the monetary form ... not a verbal "Thanks, dude!".

So, today ... beer gather and drinkers unite! (As if beer drinkers need a holiday to gather and unite). Have a beer, foreign or domestic ... and tip generously ... or the people who created your special holiday may decide they aren't being shown enough gratitude and discontinue the holiday forevermore!