A Few Wedding Pics

My boyfriend and his last little girl.
It's hard to smile when your heart is breaking.

Mother nature didn't cooperate and allow us to have the wedding in my boyfriend's garden, so the ceremony and reception were moved to another venue, but it turned out wonderfully.

I've got some great video (which I will post later) of the father/daughter dance ... and then I nearly filled up my phone with video's of my boyfriend dancing with his other daughter, his stepmother, both of my daughter's, and his youngest daughter again. I don't think anyone videotaped when my boyfriend and I danced ... which is too bad ... because we were pretty amazing!

Everyone had a a lot of fun, and despite the last minute change of venue, they got hitched without a hitch! The bride and groom wanted a small, intimate gathering with the people who mean the most to them, and that's exactly what they got. It was lovely.

The bride was radiant ... and now she and her Prince Charming are now beginning their happily ever after :)

The groom, the bride, the grandmother, the father, and the sister. 

Me and my handsome boyfriend.
Is it any wonder my heart skips a beat whenever I see him?!!!!!

Today is International Bacon Day (and Wedding Day!)

My boyfriend's daughter is getting married today ... on International Bacon Day! What a great day to get married, right?! Sadly, there is nothing even remotely related to bacon on the menu. Nevertheless, I shall do my best to celebrate this special day despite the cruelty of being denied this delicacy at the reception!

The Saturday before Labor Day is set aside as International Bacon Day. (Like we need a special day to appreciate the deliciousness of bacon!) Quite frankly, I'd be on board with celebrating International Bacon Day the first Saturday of every month! Or, how about just making it every Saturday?

Bacon, in my humble opinion, is the most delicious meat on the planet. Pretty much everything is better with bacon! I know anti-bacon people who say you take nine minutes off of your life with every piece you eat, but those are the last minutes, when you're old and sick, so I'm not really interested in prolonging those minutes! Those are the minutes I'm dreading ... and makes eating bacon that much more attractive!

I haven't have any bacon in a while and will likely survive yet another baconless day. But the wedding isn't until this evening and I don't have to be there until late afternoon ... so I could have a BLT for lunch! This midday meal, by anti-bacon calculations, will take roughly 36 minutes off of the end of my life ... and it will be worth it!

Spray Tan Drama

The white spot on my calf,
now camouflaged to my
satisfaction!

I got a spray tan at No Fry Zone after work yesterday. They warn you not to get wet for eight hours afterwards. The first time Thing 2 got a spray tan, she got one drop of water on her arm on her way to the car, and the tan disappeared entirely from that one spot ... so I took the "no water" warning to heart.

As I drove home, I could see lightening off in the distance towards my house. I had been on the north and the east sides of town all day with nary a drop, but I drove into a torrential downpour. Of course, I didn't have an umbrella with me, but even if I had, I wouldn't have risked walking (or running) from my van to the house in the rain. So, I sat in the driveway and played games on my iPad while waiting for the rain to stop. It was either that or risk being polka-dotted or mottled, which would look like my skin was melting!

My boyfriend knew I was getting a spray tan and had to be careful, so I texted him that I was sitting in my driveway waiting for the rain to stop. After having a good laugh, he suggested I come over. I could pull into his garage and get out without getting wet. We could visit while I waited for the rain to stop. Win-win! I drove over, pulled into the garage ... and hit my leg on my wet van getting out of the vehicle. Ugg! I ended up with a big white spot on my calf, and a white line running down to my ankle.

When the rain finally stopped (three hours later), I drove home and applied some self-tanning lotion to the spot. The drip line is completely gone, and I think I've camouflaged the white spot well enough that no one will notice. You would have to be pretty darn close to my leg to notice, so if anyone does get close enough, I'll promptly shoo them away ... then go stand by my boyfriend for protection!

Even if I do have a "less than perfect tan" spot on my leg, I'm glad I was offered refuge at my boyfriends house during the rain. I only had a quarter-tank of gas, and I don't think it would have lasted from 5:00 (when I got home), until 8:00 (when it finally quit raining). Not only that, I've always heard that it's hard on the engine to let a vehicle idle for long periods of time ... and I'm sure three hours would be considered a long period of time. AND, not wishing to known as the idiot who ran out of gas in her own driveway, I would have to get gas to keep the air conditioner running ... because sweat is water, so sweating for 8 hours after a tan is a no-no! As the gas tank emptied, I would have been trying to figure out which gas station would allow me the most coverage while pumping to keep from getting hit by rain.

But let's face it ... I would most likely have hit my leg getting out of the van at the gas station, too ... and the mist from the rain would probably have given me speckled appearance that would make it appear as though I had some kind of contagious skin disease. My boyfriend's daughter is getting married tomorrow, and "contagious" is not the look I'm going for! Since I'm not "legally" family, I won't be in all of the pictures, but I will undoubtedly be in some. I'm not very photogenic as it is, so a speckled/freckled suntan that looks like smallpox would have left people scrambling to get away from me!

I Have Been Deceived

Not even close!

Strangely, these (exterior) lights only needed touching up, and since they looked exactly like the top of this can, I figured I'd be able to check this chore off my "to-do" list quickly. It didn't work out that way.

I knew immediately that it wasn't the look I was going for, but I figured I'd "give it a minute". I painted both lamps ... and hated the results. I ended up going back to the store (who exchanged it without question) and went with Oil Rubbed Bronze. Initially, I almost bought Oil Rubbed Bronze, but decided I'd stick with what they already looked like. I should have went with my first instinct.

So, the little chore that should have been finished with ease ended up taking several hours. But, it's done, and they look amazing ... and I forgot to take a picture of the finished product! I'll post a pic of them later.

Which Came First ... the Chicken or the Egg?

Is Olivia's laziness rubbing off on Thing 2,
or is Thing 2's laziness rubbing off on Olivia?

The third option, of course, is that they're both just lazy by nature!

In all fairness to Thing 2, she's working and going to school full-time. I realize those two activities do not preclude her from sitting up, but I'll cut her some slack ... if she'll QUIT EATING IN THE FAMILY ROOM!!!

Guess What Made This Heart-Shaped Light on the Wall

My Scentsy pot! Isn't that weird?

We Were a Little Apprehensive When We Saw This!

This past weekend my boyfriend and I worked in his yard all morning, then we went to my house so that he could cut my grass. When we went out back, we saw this ... a storage bin with two large landscaping stones on top of it. We weren't sure what to make of it ... and wondered what was under it! Both of us were envisioning a raccoon, but neither of us could conceive a scenario where my daughter would get close enough to a raccoon to put a big bucket on it, then stack stones on top!!

I stayed up on the deck while he tapped on the bin with a shovel to see if whatever was under it was still alive. Nothing moved, so he took the stones off the top and tipped the bucket over with the shovel. It was empty! We were, to say the least, perplexed!

I texted my daughter to ask if she knew anything about it.  She did. She used the bin to take the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. I asked what the stones were for, and she said she used them to set her camera on. Mystery solved! And best of all, there was no dead ... or very angry ... animal to deal with!

Speaking of Stoplights ...

Have you ever thought about how few criminals are arrested specifically because of traffic violations? I know some are, and that's what makes it so dangerous every time a police officer makes a traffic stop ... but a lot of people get tickets everyday, and very few of those are arrested or taken in for questioning regarding some other crime they are suspected of being complicit in. Most of the ones who end up in handcuffs are arrested for drug or alcohol related offenses specifically related to that particular traffic stop, or for drugs or drug paraphernalia discovered after they were pulled over.

Ted Bundy, a notorious serial killer, was always apprehended because of a traffic stop, but he's the exception, not the rule.

I find it interesting that people who have no problem murdering and/or raping innocent women and children will draw the line at running a red light or rolling through a stop sign. They have no regard for human life or the families their actions destroy. They ignore the rules of civility ... both man-made laws and God's commandments  ... and yet they have no problem taking orders from and obeying a light bulb.

Things I Don't Understand - Episode 6: Left Turn Lights

I have never understood why it is legal for me to make a left turn off of a side street, onto a busy street ... crossing traffic coming from both directions ... with no light telling me it's okay to go ... yet I cannot be trusted to turn left at an intersection with a traffic ... against one direction of traffic ... unless the left turn light is green.

Most traffic signals in my hometown allow left turns only when the left turn light is green. I live in a city nicknamed "Stoplight City" by truckers, so when I say "most traffic signals", I'm talking about a lot of traffic signals. I can't tell you how many times I sit at a red light while the traffic lanes for cars going straight remains green ... except there are no moving vehicles in sight.  The only vehicles at the intersection are the ones in the left turn lane (with a red light), and the vehicles on the cross street. We all sit there waiting for the light to change.

I could easily, and just as importantly ... safely ... turn left, but if I did, I'd be breaking the law. Now keep in mind that before I sat at this light for five minutes, I had to turn left onto this very road not too far back ... with no outside help from anyone, man or machine. Where is the wisdom in that?

Some of the most dangerous intersections in the city allow you to turn left on a green arrow or a green light. If it's safe at the most dangerous of intersections, why is it so dangerous in safer ones?

The people who regulate traffic signals and roadways in this city probably have engineering degrees, and are a good reminder that even people who graduate in the bottom of their class can get a job with the government.

It appears Mr. Carrot is trying to make a run for it

I guess not all vegetables accept their destiny.